Help Wanted: Wardrobe Consultant

I love pink. I really do. But do I have to wear every shade of pink, every day, all at the same time? Seriously, check out some of these recent outfits Mom's come up with (though you have to admit, the pants are fabulous).













And what's with the "wild" theme? How did I get this reputation? Do I look wild to you? All I do is eat, sleep, and poop. What's so wild about that?












So if you know anyone...